Personal memories of my Grandma Settle, Byron, Oklahoma

This photo was taken of Grandma and Grandpa Settle about 1957 in front of their house in Byron , Oklahoma.
Memories of Grandma Settle during the later years of 1950-1960's when I was a child:

Farm life was not easy. Grandma worked from early morning hours to the evening doing the farm yard chores, garden work, taking care of the chickens, cleaning the house with her dust mop and sweeping the floors every day, several times a day. Her favorite turkey or goose feather quill would be used to pick up the dust in the dust pan on her beautiful hardwood floors. Seems like she was always bent over to the work on the ground. Once I remember her taking a hoe to kill an opossum that was eating the cat food in the yard... we were sure that old opossum was dead, but you can probably guess that sure enough, it walked away when we were not looking. That was a tough old opossum.

Grandma took care of lots of cats and fed them twice a day. Of course, there were too many cats to think about vaccinations then and I guess we are just lucky that they never did pick up rabies from the skunks, opossums, etc that also visited the farm yard.

When the farmhouse was built, the wash house for the laundry was a separate small building. For a long time, the washer and wringer were not electric, but sometime before my memory, Mother and Leroy talked their parents into purchasing an electric agitator and electric wringer that was mounted over the agitator. Clothes dryers were already being used in our home in Groom, but Grandma didn't see any real point in buying a clothes dryer... that's what the clothes line was for! Now, you have to understand that laundry day was only on Mondays... so we all had to be careful with our clothes to make sure they were reasonably "spot" cleaned to last through the week. The photo to the right was what the agitator/wringer machine looked like. We heated the water on top of the wood burning stove, and poured it into the top of the machine. (No hot water in the wash house, you know!)

Grandma really didn't like the water from the tap or from the underground. She thought it was too hard an full of minerals, so a big barrel caught the rain water on the side of the house. The rain water was what she insisted to use for cooking and washing her hair. We were allowed to use the tap water to bathe in and wash our hair when we were visiting, but Grandma really didn't approve of that idea very much. Grandma also made her own soap..and that process would be made with a special recipe about once a year. (see similiar recipe at bottom of this writing) When she started to make her own soap, Mom would be sure to travel up to Byron to help. In the later years, we finally persuaded her to buy Ivory flakes for using on the clothes etc. which could be purchased in a box! Remember, we had electric washer, dryer, laundry powder that we used at home in Groom, but Grandma just preferred to do things her way. She was convinced we were spending too much money on things like that at our home. But this was Grandma's way, and she must have enjoyed the simple way of doing things until the latter years when bad health finally slowed her down.

Grandma was always the worker, healthy, and the youngest of her siblings. She was strong until her arthritis finally took over her simple ways. In her later years, I remember Grandma working until she was so exhausted she would sometimes cry. Deforming arthritis would cripple her back, hands, feet to the point that she was bent over and her head would be only slightly higher than her waist. I wonder nowadays, if there are not some medical procedures that could help with this condition. Many times, Grandma would travel to various doctors, always hoping that someone could alleviate her pain. One doctor had her laying flat on her back on the day bed that her parents had owned. With a small thin rope weights were attached to connect to some brace that would stretch her spinal cord gently. The pain was excruciating and she couldn't endure that, so wrap around braces "back support" were given to her. Later in years, my own mother would wear the "back support" wraps. I think both of them suffered from severe bone loss and osteoporosis. As far as I remember, neither were faithful taking their calcium supplements, probably because the lists of medications were more than overwhelming.

Grandma would be plagued with bunions that drained, corns and calluses on her feet. When she purchased new shoes, she always mourned that fact that she must slit the sides with a razor to relieve the pressure against her pitiful feet. Her physical conditions were always a thorn in the flesh to contend with, and yet her work never slowed down.

Up by sunrise to take care of the chickens, feed the multitude of cats, cleaning house to the point of obsession (this was very much German upbringing), Grandma still had beautiful eyes and a kind expression. She never cut her hair and I remember staying with her in the summers after my Grandpa passed away. Grandpa, the American farmer that she married, had passed away sitting in his old 1950 something black Ford pickup checking on cattle in the pasture. My uncle Leroy found Grandpa later that day, when Grandma called him worrying about his missing. Mother and Grandma both asked if I'd like to stay several weeks with Grandma the following summers and agreed.

Those were summers that I could observe and be influenced by her the most. Just Grandma and me alone in the beautiful northern Oklahoma farm, and the memories just flood to me. The countryside was plush and beautiful, just like the good year crops, but with the goodness of the soil, the landscape and the farm life, came violent tornadic weather in the months of June and July.

Here is a photo of the Byron, Oklahoma First Christian Church. This was one of the important places for the family and the center of their social existence, not only worship, but family weddings, showers, singings, vacation Bible schools, as well as the final funeral services. Grandma and Grandad Settle both had funerals here, as well as Uncle Leroy, and his wife Grace.

This photo shows the graves of Lizzie and Burt Settle. The graves are located in the Cherokee Cemetery on the eastern side. For years, a beautiful wheat field was adjacent to the cemetery and we we always thought that was just where Grandma and Grandpa would've loved to be laid to rest.

Night after night, Grandma would wake me to follow her to the storm cellar that was located outside of the house next to the fence between the "wash house" and "septic tank". The door was heavy, but she would not allow me to lift the door for her-- what a picture in my memory of Grandma, bent over with excruciating arthritis lifting that cellar door.

I think she wouldn't have done that if she were alone, but that was typical Grandma and I doubt there were many days when she was just thinking of herself. I suppose her 10 year old granddaughter (me) was enough motivation to risk the horrible torrential rain and strong winds to lift the cellar door and step down into the cold, musty cellar. Living on the farm house in Byron was like reading a novel from old days. I especially remember the old "hand ring" type phones with an operator in Byron that connected the phone to anything to the east or north of Byron. I think I remember the Settle house ring as one short, two longs. Mother's brother Leroy and his family lived east of Byron--so every time we talked to them, the operator was "rang". I don't remember the ring numbers for the operator...just one long ring, I think. I do remember that many people could listen into the conversations and many, many stories were told (probably some of them not true) just for the "ears" down the line that were eavesdropping.

When Grandma had a hysterectomy, Mom, Steve and I went to stay with Grandma for about a month. Mom stayed with Grandma while she recovered, and during the morning time, Steve and I actually rode the bus into the Byron schools and attended there keeping up with our lessons that our Groom Elementary teachers had given us, and the lessons at the Byron schools. Steve really grew homesick for home in Groom, but I kind of enjoyed the whole process of being a 3rd grader in two schools at the same time. My class in Byron was composed of three grades in one room, and I must have been in the 3rd, 4th 5th grade combination class, but Steve was in the 1st and 2nd grade. It was actually a great little country school, and left many impressions on me throughout my teaching career. I learned then that the amount of money a school system has can only help the quality of education up to a point; the heart of the classroom and it's effectiveness is the teacher and his or her attitude. I thought the teacher in this tiny little country classroom was amazing.

Below is an earlier photo about 1928 of Grandma and Mom (second lady from the left with the young girl,Mom). I am not sure about the other person, but think it may have been my Aunt Elizabeth.

I think one of the most important memories that I have centers on the Memorial Day routines. This is something my own children will never experience.Memorial Day is just when the best of the roses, peonies, irises, gladiolas are blooming beyond belief in northern Oklahoma, Cherokee county. The night before Memorial Day, Mom would always drive to Byron to stay with Grandma and Grandpa. The preparation for the cemetery would begin with the best of the beautiful flowers cut and placed in coffee cans of cold water wrapped in aluminum foil. The flowers would be left in the wash house to stay cool all evening. The next morning, we would get up earlier than normal and drive about 10 miles out to the Cherokee cemetery, then the Alva Cemetery to set the coffee cans with flowers on the graves of as many relatives as we could. Other relatives would often be there as well and it was something like a small family reunion at the cemetery. I remember Steve, my cousin Karen, and I would race and run around the cemetery area until the grownups would insist we be more respectful and stop running and making so much noise...but for us, it was just fun and the cemetery was a good place to see the other relatives and neighbors.




Then we would all get in our cars and drive back to the farm in Byron for the dinner with the family. Grandma, Mom, and Grace would prepare the country dinner that included fresh fried chicken (no grocery store chicken would ever be set on Grandma's table), fried okra, potatoes, gravy, lettuce and cantaloupe from the garden, green onions, peach cobbler, brewed ice tea, salad, green beans--simply a farm feast from the fresh produce. I guess nothing was purchased at the store, except maybe the tea bags and probably ice cream for the cobbler. Grandma and Grandad Settle's garden was not a simple plot of land, it was half a city block and the hours and hours of work to maintain it just part of the daily farm routine. Of course, the chicken was fresh and killed the early morning the same day. We all sat around the table in the dining area and the family stories would begin. Uncle Leroy always put his chicken bones on my plate when I wasn't looking and then loudly complained about my eating too much. He loved to tease us all and we never knew who would be the focus of his next joke.




After the cemetery visit and dinner, all would go back to their own farms and we would spend the late afternoon visiting and enjoying the farm life. Usually, the evenings were frequented with showers and often severe thunderstorms and wind.

Below right is a photo of Peter and Christina Schwindt's tombstone located in the Cherokee Cemetery just west of the Settle graves. Peter and Christina were Grandma Lizzie's parents. We spent many Memorial Day cemetery gatherings visiting relatives at this grave site! They passed away before I was born and I never had a chance to know them.



This photo (lower right) is taken from the county road in front of the farm house in Byron, Oklahoma.




The following is a recipe I found that sounds just like the lye soap recipe that Grandma used: Grandma's Homemade Lye Soap Recipe

There are numerous recipes for homemade lye soap. Below is a very basic one that is easy to use for any beginner.

Basic items needed to make your own soap:

•large oven ware bowl with handle and a spout.
•large stoneware crock, stainless steel or iron cooking pot.
•A long handled heavy duty wooden or stainless steel spoon for stirring the mixture.
•Small shallow cardboard or wooden box lined with a damp linen dish towel

Ingredients:

•One 12 oz. can of 100% lye
•21-1/2 oz. ice cold or partially frozen distilled or rain water
•5 lb., 7-1/3 oz. (2.48 kg) lard (this came from the pork butchering).

Directions:

Place the water and or ice cubes into the bowl, carefully add the lye to the water. Do not reverse this process. Using your stirring spoon stir carefully till the lye has dissolved. Cover and let set until it drops in temperature to around 85 degrees.

Melt your lard and put into the 4-6 quart container; let cool to 95 degrees. Now you can start to make your soap.

With your stirring spoon, start to stir in an "8" pattern. Slowly pour the lye water into the melted lard. Pour very carefully and slowly, making the flow of the lye water smaller than a pencil...just trickle it in until its all been added. Once you start this process you must keep stirring until the mix is thick like a cooked pudding. If you stop stirring it may separate. The key is constant gentle stirring.

When the mix has thickened up you can then pour it into your lined box. Allow to set for 4-6 hours. Using a table knife you can cut into bars. Do not use a sharp knife that will cut into the plastic liner. Allow a week for drying time before you remove the soap from the box. After the soap is removed from the box, allow the soap to cure for 30 days before using it. Cut into small 2 or 3 inch squares when ready to store. Can be grated into flakes for laundry soap as well.